Gawker Reports Mark Zuckerberg’s Engaged, Which Leads To A Discussion Of What’s Wrong With Asian Women, Naturally

June 22nd, 2011

By Guest Contributor Jen Wang, cross-posted from Disgrasian

Mark Zuckerberg is engaged! Maybe. Bill Gates seems to think so anyway, calling Zuckerberg’s longtime girlfriend, med student Priscilla Chan, Zuck’s “fiancee” in a recent interview. Gawker picked up on this, and naturally, naturally, a conversation ensued in the comments section concerning why someone like Cilla would be with someone like Zuck.

THEORY #1: ASIAN WOMEN LOVE UGLY WHITE GUYS

THEORY #2: ASIAN WOMEN LOVE “CREEPY ASIAN FETISH GUYS” BECAUSE THOSE GUYS THINK ASIAN WOMEN ARE SUPERIOR TO “AMERICAN” WOMEN

(P.S. Priscilla Chan is a Massachusetts native and therefore “American.” But I digress.)

THEORY #3: ASIAN WOMEN WANT THEIR CHILDREN TO HAVE WHITE SKIN AND ROUND EYES BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT STARS IN CHINA AND KOREA LOOK LIKE

What, no comments about gold-digging? Seems like a fairly obvious angle, pre-nup or no. Don’t you think Asian women love money, Gawker commenters? Huh? It’s like you don’t know us at all.

Oh wait.